I am sorry I’m a failure.
A far cry from the man I should be for you.
I am sorry.
You were right that I am nothing.
A coward. I deserve to be punished.
After all, when you lay your hands on me, I have nowhere to hide my shame,
You leave me lame I forget even my own name,
You forever remind me of how much I am alien to my own gender
A weakling. A worm.
Alas it is my fault you treat me like this
I should be better. Do better.
So when your words pierce through me…
When my body aches from the weight of your hands on me…
I only got what was coming to me.

Again I am sorry.
I came home late last night.
Immediately, your raise your fists for a fight.
Once again your slap rings in my ears.
Over and over, you punch me, kick me.
Like an ugly monster you crave for blood.
like a river, it flows down my face.
You leave me there, what’s left of my dignity out the window.
But I don’t cry.
Only now my mind wanders to why I was late. Yet again I have failed.

But I cannot take anymore.
I was never going to be enough for you.
I am alone in this.
I only know too well society will mock me.
Confirm my infirmity.
But I cannot continue.
So I breathe my last
To anyone who loved me.
I am sorry.

By Ruvarashe Makoni
Hilbright Science College